DECLASSIFIED* APPROVED FOR
RELEASE**

████████

The First Memecoin Where You Actually Know What You're Getting:
Absolutely Nothing.

DEPARTMENT OF TRANSPARENCY

Office of Selective Disclosure • Washington, D.C.

TO:

The American Public

FROM:

████████████

DATE:

December 2025

RE:

Introduction of $REDACTED Token

CASE:

Epstein Files Release (Heavily Modified)

Following the release of ████████ pages of documents relating to the investigation of ██████ ███████, this Department is pleased to announce the launch of $REDACTED — a cryptocurrency designed to immortalize the art of strategic transparency on the Ethereum blockchain.

As demonstrated by recent events, true transparency means releasing thousands of documents where ███ █████ ██ █████ ████████ ███ ████ ██████████. In this spirit, $REDACTED ensures that all holders will receive exactly as much information as they deserve: ████████████████████████████████████████████.

"Simply releasing a mountain of blacked out pages violates the spirit of transparency and the letter of the law."

— Sen. Chuck Schumer, December 2025

Our review of the ███████ Files has confirmed that all individuals listed in the contact book are █████████████████████, and the masseuse list contains only ██████████████████████████████████████. We can also confirm that █████████ never ████████ with ████████████ on ██████ ██████.

EXHIBIT A: CONTACT BOOK (REDACTED FOR NATIONAL SECURITY)

* Names redacted to protect ██████ ██████████

TOKENOMICS (UNCLASSIFIED)

TOTAL SUPPLY

█████████████

TAX

0% (DISCLOSED)

BURNED

CONTRACT

RENOUNCED


// Contract Address (DECLASSIFIED)
0x████████████████████████████████████████

// Deployer: [REDACTED]
// Source Code: Verified ✓
// Audit Status: ██████████████

function reveal() public view returns (string memory) {
    return "Nice try.";
}

EXHIBIT B: MASSEUSE LIST

EXHIBIT C: FLIGHT LOGS

Passenger: ████████

Destination: █████ ██████

Date: ██/██/████

Purpose: ████████████████

Other passengers: ███████████████████████████████

EXHIBIT D: GRAND JURY TESTIMONY

[119 PAGES REDACTED]

EXHIBIT E: "MISSING" FILES

🗑️

16 files have been removed from the DOJ website for ███████ reasons

"All of us are infuriated by this. It's another slap in the face. We expected way more."

— Marina Lacerda, Epstein Survivor

WHY $REDACTED? Because in a world where ████████████████ can make ████████ disappear overnight, where 119 pages of testimony become solid black rectangles, and where photographs are deleted faster than you can say "transparency act" — we thought: why not put that energy on-chain?

Every $REDACTED transaction is fully transparent on the blockchain — unlike the ███████ █████ that were supposed to be released to the public. While ████████████ hides behind "victim protection," we hide behind nothing. Our contract is open source. Our supply is fixed. Our intentions are... well, they're satirical.

THE ROADMAP:

Phase 1: ████████████████████
Phase 2: ██████████████████████████
Phase 3: ████████████████████████████████
Phase 4: Full Transparency (Just Kidding)

OBTAIN CLEARANCE

Join the most transparent community on Ethereum

BUY $REDACTED

Available on Uniswap • DEXTools • ████████

DISCLAIMER: $REDACTED is a satirical memecoin created as commentary on the heavily redacted Epstein files. This is not financial advice. The token has no intrinsic value beyond its comedic criticism of ████████████████████████████. Do your own research. Don't invest more than you can afford to lose. Unlike certain government documents, our risks are fully disclosed.